The Library

In this episode of The UnBroken podcast, Dr Rachel does her first Q and A of the season with Dr Joey Weber – a man striving to introduce equanimity into everyone’s life, as mindfulness is not enough. They discuss some of the biggest talk-points, from kindness to belonging and how equanimity matters. They examine key life philosophies from how to live in balance and what having favourite words can do for the soul. This is for you if you yearn to find home and seek belonging.  

“I enjoyed for once someone asking very human, but often unasked and overlooked questions. I would like to go on one of these [podcast episodes] every day as it was like being in a mirror” – Dr Joey Weber 

Key Insights From This Episode: 

  • You are the expert on you and we need to give more power to the people and realise that actually everything that they think, everything that they understand about themselves is actually really valid – Dr Rachel 
  • This is not just a podcast. I want to try a completely different way of viewing life, wellbeing, how to live – Dr Rachel 
  • I think that’s what pain’s message is for us, to kind of take note and go hang on a minute something needs to happen differently – Dr Joey 
  • All these moments of key kind of pain and shocking events of things that just happen when you catch you off guard, they are kind of really unique, special moments. Although at the time, probably we don’t see it and we hate it, but ultimately, they really do shape who you want to become and who you are today – Dr Joey 
  • I think pain specifically kind of forces the hand and makes you change or want to change, or seek some kind of external help or something – Dr Joey 
  • Some people can hold pain for their entire lives, there needs to be more education around how to manage and emotionally regulate yourself – Dr Joey 
  • I think it’s really interesting, particularly around emotional pain that we actually feel that acutely as if we’ve broken an arm or had a heart attack or if we’ve got a burn, the brain and the nervous system treats it all the same – Dr Rachel 
  • There’s a plethora of stuff that’s available to help us deal with the symptoms, but to actually deal with pain is a completely different story – Dr Rachel 
  • We have this tremendous capacity to just keep on going, no matter what the situation, circumstance is to somehow try and find the positive in it, the meaning behind it. And I think that’s incredible – Dr Joey 

TO THE FULL EPISODE OF THE (UN)BROKEN PODCAST HERE

About Our Guests: 

Dr Joey Weber 

https://equanamee.com/  
Email: info@equanamee.com 
Follow Dr Joey on Twitter 
Connect with Dr Joey on Linkedin 
Follow Dr Joey on Instagram 

Dr Weber is a Lecturer in Health and Social care. His PhD thesis entitled ‘The role of equanimity in the facilitation of positive mental states and mental well-being’ focuses on barriers to equanimity within the provinces of health and well-being. He is interested in fine tuning the therapeutic processes within mindfulness. 

About Our Host 

Dr Rachel Taylor 

drrachel@drracheltaylor.co.uk  

Dr Rachel Taylor is a neuroscientist with decades of experience exploring, discovering and solving everyday challenges faced by many, as well as listening to and telling the stories of people she comes across in her endeavour to show difference is good, trauma is endemic and joy is connection. She started UnBroken as she wanted to highlight that the system is broken not people and uses the UnBroken podcast to share her learnings, honest conversations and words of wisdom with the UnBroken Tribe of listener. 

About UnBroken  

UnBroken is founded upon the belief that the environment in which we were born, grew in, live in, work in, play in and rest in has a huge impact on how well we believe we are and how well we perform. Wellbeing and optimal human performance are not simply about the absence of disease, they are about the ability to live purposefully, intentionally, joyfully and freely.   

UnBroken provides a range of supportive online resources including a podcast, blog, apothecary and monthly online membership for people who dare to be different, are open to possibilities and want a different pathway to their own version of success. 

Transcript 

Dr Rachel: So I’d like to welcome to this episode of the UnBroken Podcast. a good friend and colleague of mine, Dr. Joey Weber. And I’m really excited that you have agreed to be part of the UnBroken Podcast. As you know, I’m going to be asking a series of questions and just inviting your thoughts, your musings, and just your general perception to the answers. 

So welcome Joey. Welcome. And, thank you for being on the show.  

Dr Joey: Ah, thanks. Thanks Dr. Rachel, that’s a nice introduction and I’m very happy to be here if a little intrigued about what questions are coming out me. I’m really excited to spend some time with you because it’s always illuminating. 

Dr Rachel: Well, thank you for that. So, as you know, Joey, I like to really get to the depth of people. And that’s possibly one of the key attributes of UnBroken is that everybody is the expert on themselves. You are the expert on you and we need to give more power to the people and realise that actually everything that they think, everything that they understand about themselves is actually really valid. I’ve tried to pull that out with the questions that we’re going to ask. So without further ado let’s crack on.  

And the first thing that I’m sure everybody would love to know is, what are you known for Dr. Joey Weber? What are you known for? 

Dr Joey: Well, I’m probably known for not a lot. And I’m probably known in very small circles, maybe a book that I’ve written about my PhD on why mindfulness is not enough, unlocking compassionate with equanimity. It’s based upon my PhD research. I’m trying to become known for that, I guess. but at the moment, I kind of feel that I’m still not known. 

To my friends, family, I’m probably known for being a kind of very pragmatic, easygoing person and to my partners, probably a bit of a crazy guy, bit of a maniac, up and down at times, emotionally and to the rest of the world I’m trying to portray this kind of complete calm character, an economist character. 

Dr Rachel: So you’re saying that you’re known for being the equanimity guru expert.  

Dr Joey: Well in very, very small circles. So far, yeah. Maybe!  

Dr Rachel: With a twist of crazy. I quite like that.  

Dr Joey: Well, there’s the, you know, the whole Shakespeare quote and many faces in that. Well, for someone like me, that feels very apt. I’m kind of different all the time, every day. 

There’s a constant within all of it, which is very contemplative and kind of thoughtful and reflective in terms of improving myself. But yeah, obviously I can display different characteristics. I think that the not known for, it’s probably in my research at the moment, which I think can have a positive impact in the world. 

Dr Rachel: Well, you’ve just led quite naturally on to the second question. What you not known for?  

Dr Joey: So, what am I not known for? Yeah. I mean, the same answer there, it’s the two sides of the coin. I’m known for what I put out in the world and I’m not known for what I don’t put out, but really what I don’t put out is all the hidden characteristics, the only my close friends, like you and my girlfriend, et cetera, knows. 

Dr Rachel: Would you like to share any of those with any of the UnBroken Podcast listeners? 

Dr Joey: Is the UnBroken Podcast going to be not known or is it going to become known?  

Dr Rachel: I’m very much hoping that it’s going to become known. 

The point of this is that, you know, this is not just a podcast. I want to try a completely different way of viewing life, wellbeing, how to live. So hopefully it won’t be not known for that. It will be known for, you know, being quite interesting to people. 

Dr Joey: In that case, I’ll leave me there. I leave what I’m known for, or not known for. I’m lost now.  

Dr Rachel: I’ll rescue you, which never normally happens. I’d never rescued most people these days. So let’s go into the third question. What had to happen for you to realise that change needed to happen in your life?  

Dr Joey: Oh, wow. What had to happen? And you want to go deep don’t you? So I guess. What has to happen to me is for some form of kind of change, a kind of pain, it’s that moment of kind of rupture, if you know where something just stops you in your tracks. And I think that’s what pain’s, kind of, message is for for us to kind of take note and go hang on a minute something needs to happen differently.  

And for me, a massive thing was the birth of my daughter 11 years ago now. And, yeah, it just kind of completely changes everything, and your entire perspective, worldview, your entire responsibilities, what you want out of life, everything kind of changes. And so I think that kind of moment, it did involve some tricky aspects at the beginning, really changes how you then go forward.  

I really do value it as a good thing. And all these moments of key kind of pain and shocking events of things that just happen when you catch you off guard, they are kind of really unique, special moments. Although at the time, probably we don’t see it and we hate it, but ultimately they really do shape who you want to become and who you are today. 

Dr Rachel: What does pain mean to you? You spoke about pain a lot just then around, you know, for you, you have to feel pain to realise that change needs to happen. So what does pain mean to you?  

Dr Joey: Pain means this kind of and overwhelming… Obviously there’s different forms of pain isn’t there, but this kind of, if it’s an internal, emotional pain, it means that there is a moment in time in which you are at a crossroads, perhaps.  

I think pain specifically kind of forces the hand and makes you change or want to change, or seek some kind of external help or something.  

Dr Rachel: I think it’s really interesting with, you sort of mentioning emotional pain because we know for research and neuroscience that the brain and the nervous system feels emotional pain in the same way that it feels physical pain. 

And often the work that I do is trying to help people, support people, to connect the body and the brain together, because we’re not just merely parts, but we’re whole. I think it’s really interesting, particularly around emotional pain that we actually feel that acutely as if we’ve broken an arm or had a heart attack or if we’ve got a burn, the brain and the nervous system treats it all the same. 

And yet, I don’t think that emotional pain is understood or recognised enough. I’m sure a lot of people would much prefer to have a broken arm than a broken heart.  

Dr Joey: That is interesting. Isn’t it? Physical’s okay, but emotional’s something that we kind of repress and withdraw from, it’s not expressed enough. 

I think that with the physical pain, because it’s so obvious and tangible, if you put your finger in a fire, it’s going to get burned and you go “Ow” you know? But obviously if that happens internally, there’s no metric of what to take out and how to deal with that. Some people can hold pain for their entire lives, there needs to be more education around how to manage and emotionally regulate yourself. 

That’s the most therapeutic beneficial thing for you to do, but I think we’re not very articulate with understanding our emotions. And it’s not just about emotional intelligence, but it’s about this feeling kind of expression as well, and communication with pain that we need to allow it to pass through the body. 

And we need to allow it to be there and almost to respect it as well and to understand and analyse why it’s happening the way it is, before we can then let it go. It’s not so easy to just go “oh, emotional pain, right. I’m going to go buy something now to make me feel happy”.  

Dr Rachel: But interestingly, that’s what we’re convinced we need to do. 

We’re convinced on a daily basis with all the messaging around us, that we can deal with the symptoms of pain and we never actually deal with the pain. There’s a plethora of stuff that’s available to help us deal with the symptoms, but to actually deal with pain is a completely different story. And, again, talking about emotional pain coming through the body, which part of your body would you say is the wisest? 

Dr Joey: Which part of my body is the wisest? Probably, I think my knees. They’re quite strong, they’ve got a few little clicks now. But they go through a lot every day, the constantly bending in some form, walking. Well the last year, probably a lot of sitting down, but there’s a lot of pressure and strain on the knees as well, isn’t there? It’s a joint that’s always in action, or ready to be in action. And they just perform. So when it’s requested, you know, it just happens. They’re just there for you. And so I mean, our body’s amazing really isn’t it. You get me really thinking about, I want to celebrate my knees! 

Dr Rachel: Well, we don’t celebrate our bodies enough, do we? All we do is criticise our bodies. I’ll look and compare and think, “oh, you know, I’m less than,” but our bodies are literally amazing what they do every day without even thinking about it.  

Dr Joey: What is it now? 10th of June, National Knee Day! 

Dr Rachel: So tell me Joey. Where do you feel that you belong the most?  

Dr Joey: I belong the most in the Lake District, whereas born and raised, brought up. And now I always see that place as a kind of a home. If anything was ever going wrong in my life or whatever I just had back then.  

And I know it’s about parents as well, and they’re still there and around there, and all my old friends, et cetera. But there’s also something a bit magical or a bit spiritual in terms of going home. We all kind of have that feeling. And I always think of it as if when crisis happens, where would you go and who would you turn to? And those answers tell you who is close to you and the place that you admire. So I’d go there in a heartbeat.  

Dr Rachel: You just mentioned magic and feeling spiritual. When was the last time you felt awe? 

Dr Joey: I’d like to say feel it every day. I mean, in mindfulness, you know, we’re kind of not supposed to, but kind of a product of being in the moment is that you experienced things all the time with a fresh pair of eyes. 

But real, real awe. I think sometimes with these concepts, we can claim them too quickly. And it’s become desensitised. And so when we do experience it, you know. So most of the time we think we know, but we don’t really know. We’re just kind of pretending on the idea of it. 

We think I’ve done a lot with awe, because I think it’s something that everyone loves or wants to have, this experience of awe. Because then the whole world makes sense and everything it seems to have clicked and is in the right order and you that are conscious of it. So for me, awe… there was a time, I have these moments, you know, where the kind of hair stands up on the back of my neck get goosebumps. 

Very, very rare, but I have these moments in life, in which I just have this profound sense of, “oh, that makes complete sense”. Both intrinsically and extrinsically, you know, internally, externally. So like whatever’s happening, who I’m with, the moment, the time, that realisation it’s the kind of “Ah”. There’s one of those in South Africa when my mum was scattering her Mum’s ashes. 

And, we went to this beach to do so on the back of a picture that my mom had had, where her Mum was playing, doing cartwheels and stuff, and we didn’t know where to go, we just had a kind of very general area to go to. And we went there and we went to this beach and we just wanted to find a suitable place to scatter the ashes. 

So we were climbing over rocks and going in between rocks, and sand and things like that, through water, wading in knee deep to get to this other cove. And you know, it wasn’t a giving up, but it was a kind of Mum just at this, “Oh, let’s just, I think let’s do it here. This is a perfect spot.” 

So anyway, we did it there and then we put our bags on this rock. And then somehow I looked at this frame, the rock in my eyes, and I just thought, “hang on a minute, give me that photo.” And the photo was the exact same photo as where her mum was. It was the exact same frame, the same rocks, the same carving, the same kind of shading in the ground. 

Yeah, it was surreal. And then around the area that was five or six photos and we managed to kind of pinpoint exactly where she was. And it was that kind of, wow. That for me was an awe moment because everything just made sense. And somehow we got right back to that exact same spot.  

Dr Rachel: Yeah, I can sort of feel it. 

I’ve got a little bit, goosebumpy just listening to recall that. Like that is pretty amazing. And you’re quite right with the fact that awe has been hijacked to a certain amount. I think one of the things with UnBroken is trying to get people in touch with real awe, when actually you’re connecting with something outside of yourself. 

And it’s making a difference in a sense of purpose, in a sense of being, in a sense of this is why I’m here. So you’re putting a meaning onto that. I think it’s really, really important. So in thinking of all of that, what do you consider a human’s greatest asset to be,  

Dr Joey: A human’s greatest asset? I would say resilience. 

I would say this kind of mindset, feeling, just keeping going, because I think life is very hard and difficult at times. And it’s like, we have this tremendous capacity to just keep on going, no matter what the situation, circumstance is to somehow try and find the positive in it, the meaning behind it. And I think that’s incredible. 

Yeah. And other than that, sarcasm. 

Dr Rachel: That’s so funny. So how important do you think self autonomy is?  

Dr Joey: Self autonomy, yeah. Huge. I think it’s so important. It’s interesting question, actually, because I think in my life, I’ve kind of struggled with this concept and probably still am. But to become… I’m now a man and a dad, and all these labels that you’re supposed to be, and a lecturer and an author and all this lot. It’s so, so critical to feel genuinely inside that you have control of your life. 

And that you can call the shots, and that what happens to you is because of your actions and behaviour alone. I think there’s too much blaming of all other situations and circumstances around us, that make us go “well, actually, no, I didn’t mean to be mean, society made me mean”, or the flip side is, you know, “my parents didn’t, you know, do this so this is why I’m like this” 

Although that’s to a large part useful at times, it’s not the only reason. We need to take ownership of how we behave in the world. And, because we’re intelligent beings and if something has happened to us that’s unjust then there has to be a reason for that. 

And we need to analyse that and understand that. And point your finger, not at others, but inside. 

Dr Rachel: Yeah, I completely agree. And I certainly think that human beings, the majority are reacting completely from the emotional limbic center of the brain, the limbic system is manifest and people are reacting rather than thinking and then responding. 

I think self autonomy, that ability to actually look within and retake control of self is huge in that I think we really need to start considering it a little bit more. 

And alongside that, something that I’m really passionate about is kindness. But my definition of kindness isn’t sort of what the general, social media trending kindness tends to be, but, you know, what does kindness mean to you? 

Dr Joey: I’m really interested now in what your definition of kindness is? What do you think the trending thing is. It’s a very basic, you know, I’ll share a sweet with you.  

Dr Rachel: There’s so much narrative on ‘be kind’, but all I see is indulgence. Because sometimes to be kind, you have to be tough, you have to have discipline. 

And for me, kindness is about “how is this action going to affect me and another person in the short term, medium term and longterm?” You know, I realised last year that I was being really indulgent. I was getting to a point where I was escaping into bed with a Green and Blacks 85% dark chocolate bar around six o’clock at night. 

Because it was tired and fed up and I try to kid myself that was kindness and it wasn’t, it was indulgence. Did it make me feel better? No. You know, in the long-term it was like, literally I rode into Green and Black’s addiction. Kindness for me was something completely different. And I just think that kindness, we really need to think about what kindness is. 

I think for me, kindness is the complete opposite. Indulgence should be a treat. And that’s what it should be. We need treats, but we don’t need to have treats just because something bad has happened or just because we feel hurt or just because we feel sad. We need to look and think… the kind of thing is to look and think, what do we need to do differently so I don’t feel like this in the future? So that’s my kindness. What’s your kindness. 

Dr Joey: Well, you make me feel silly now, I was going to say Green and Blacks! 

Dr Rachel: Don’t feel silly, there’s room in the world for everybody’s opinions. 

Dr Joey: Yeah, kindness. I think you’re right. There’s a bit of a bit too much indulgence, et cetera. Yeah, it’s all these terms. 

I think there’s umbrella concepts underneath, like supportive… it depends what type of kindness, I guess. If you’re just being kind to yourself, then what does that mean? Does it go as deep as self-compassion? Are you just allowing yourself to have a beer or a cigarette and not judging yourself for it? 

Like, there’s different aspects of it isn’t there, but I think, yeah, Green and Black’s all the way for me. 

Dr Rachel: So do you think that ruthlessness is good, bad or ugly? 

Dr Joey: Not heard that word for awhile, ruthlessness. I mean, I think it’s everything, isn’t it. That’s what I’m beginning to… that’s what my knees are telling me as I’m getting older is that I’m a beginning to be a bit more wise with these concepts and I think ruthlessness can be good, because sometimes you need it. Sometimes you have to be ruthful to behind. I mean, are they go cruel to be kind? Isn’t it, it’s the same thing. 

Dr Rachel: I think I prefer I have to be tough to be kind, rather than cruel. Sometimes you need to be tough. 

Dr Joey: Yeah, I suppose to be honest. Yeah, cruel’s probably the opposite. Isn’t it? Don’t quote me on that. You’ll have to cut that out. 

But in terms of it might appear cruel, but at the same time, all these things have these appearances that may or may not be true on and underneath and underlying and long term. So we could label something cruel, but ultimately it’s being perceived as cruel because it it’s appearing quite tough, harsh, and you know, it’s like, whoa, but actually there’s a good intention behind that. 

It all comes back to intention. And what you place upon your behaviour beforehand. Like if you, if my intention is ultimately love, but I am ruthless for a second in a relationship, you know, that doesn’t mean it’s necessarily bad, right? 

Dr Rachel: And, this is the joy really of sort of the exploration of the UnBroken podcast, because it’s something that, there is no good, there is no bad, there is just perception and perspective.  

Widen that conversation and discussion and debate and really start looking at how somebody can get autonomy in their life, how they can realise that their UnBroken, how they can get control of themselves and create the life that they want. 

And I think, you know, ruthlessness is very much part of that because quite a lot of people who think that they are broken tend to be people who put people’s needs above their own constantly. And I think having that sort of ruthlessness around what do I need, what is good for me? 

And then sort of looking at how that cascades out to the wider community. I think ruthlessness is key to that.  

Dr Joey: It’s good, bad and ugly, it’s everything isn’t it. It depends what kind of face and what intention behind it, but different aspects of the same thing. I think that’s what’s happening or I’m realising more and more is that it’s just the label that we put on it. 

Dr Rachel: And we’ll have to realise that we’re all more than just labels as well. You know, I think some say I’m not label, I’m just a human being, who’s trying to live a life in the best way that that is for me. And that’s what I would encourage everybody to do. I don’t want to put a label on anybody. 

I think it’s really important and people can explore that part of themselves and sort of part of that… The next thing I wanted to ask you, in order to gain something we have to lose something. And often people don’t realise that. And even if it’s something that’s not particularly working for us, it’s still a loss. And people are sometimes not prepared for the enormity of the grief and the loss process that they have to go through. 

Even when they’re trying to lose something that’s not good for them. So have you ever lost anything? What did you lose in order to gain a better life for yourself?  

Dr Joey: I think you could go back to the whole, birth of my daughter thing. I lost a lot of control in that moment, or the perception of control in terms of what I wanted to do, who I wanted to be or to look. But ultimately I gained a whole host of different social skills from it. I then absolutely, head first dove into career, because it was like, all right, what was the one thing I can do of my own kind of autonomy? It’s career. 

So I went heavy into career and have ended up in PhD, blah-de-blah. And, maybe that wouldn’t have happened, because I had all these ideas of being a wandering traveler and being more kind of like a hippy and cool, and just living on a beach or something. 

It still comes back to me every now and then, the kind of, “oh, look what I can’t do”, but I think it’s, if I was I’d probably be a very depressed hippy.  

Dr Rachel: That’s a book title if I’ve ever heard one, “The depressed hippy”  

Dr Joey: It can be a sequel to my book. My academic book won’t go anywhere, But the depressed hippy will. 

Dr Rachel: It’ll be a best seller. You heard it hear  first, “The Depressed Hippy” started on the UnBroken podcast.  

So, moving on from the question, one of the key things hat I think is really important is that people realise how much they need to play, how much fun they need. That’s how we learn and that’s how we’re social. So how do you play and how often do you do it.  

Dr Joey: I am an absolute expert player. Well, that sounds awful. Basically, that is one thing I will own and is my play with my daughter. 

I think it’s also the every other weekend type situation. In that, when you get your children, you just want to absolute pour attention on them. And then through that comes play. And now it’s like, I don’t stop playing basically when I’m with her, now I kind of hold myself to a high level, a high account of am I playing enough? 

Because I think it’s really crucial. The play journey, the kind of emotional social competencies that developed through play, through something very daft, I think it’s absolutely amazing. And it constructs so much kind of morality, opportunity for self-reflection to emotional express to regulate. 

I find it brilliant. And so I play wherever possible. I’ve got a good group of friends, that were incredibly daft. We don’t do anything but be silly and it’s that type of relationship. That’s probably the kind of sturdy pillar that I’m always hanging on to as a kind of freedom, because for me, it’s freedom because life can get so boring and mundane and difficult and challenging, and always trying to achieve and do this and do that.  

At the end of the day, play, all of that kind of stuff just dissipates. And you just, you just started to play at that moment in time. Brilliant.  

Dr Rachel: Well, in listening to what you were saying about play, you said the word daft quite a few times and I actually thought, “God, I’ve not heard that for such a while. It’s such a Northern word.” 

And now I live sort of in the south of the UK. It just makes me think, I love that word. What’s your favourite word and why? 

Dr Joey: Let’s go with that. We’ve got to go with daft now. 

There is a brilliant word. Isn’t it?  

Dr Rachel: I don’t know if it’s better because we’re Northern, it sounds better in the Northern tones, daft. 

Dr Joey: Daft, yeah, it’s kind of like, it’s almost like an anti-word. Isn’t it? It doesn’t really make sense. When you say it more and more daft, daft, daft, I mean, no words do, but it’s kind of like, we’ve got this language and these words to express ourselves in order to make sense and meaning of reality, but kind of daft doesn’t fit. 

It’s like that surely shouldn’t be there to kind of aid any meaning and stuff. It’s just a kind of is-ness, you know, it’s kind of a silly, playful word love that. 

Dr Rachel: So thank you for reintroducing daft into my life. 

Dr Joey: If you want the professional word, it has to be equanimity.  

Dr Rachel: Well that just rolls off the tongue. 

Thank you. And why is equanimity your favourite word?  

Dr Joey: Personally, it’s the word, the construct I think I’ve fallen in love with. Became very obsessed with. Perhaps my eyes have started wandering into other places, but to be honest, equanimity for me, it’s such a beautiful idea and construct and notion to have, and it’s like this pillar in the distance, or flag in the distance that we’re kind of trying to get to. 

Whether or not we’ll get there fully, or fully be equanimous in every situation. I’m not sure, but I think we can definitely chip away at our own sense of self, our own labelling our own projections of right wrong, good, bad, like, detest, et cetera, and understanding through self-analysis and wisdom that, with compassion, we can just be with everything, no matter what it is, that’s happening to us. 

And so it’s this kind of beautiful idea in my, in my opinion, that you can sum it up in the word balance. It’s balance, mental balance and equanimity towards everything.  

Dr Rachel: I completely agree. And you know, for me, it’s like the epitome of peace. Have that equanimous state. So I’d like you to describe your philosophy of life in a haiku or a limerick, please. 

Dr Joey: This is my haiku.  

Life deeply unknown. 

Look in  

and play hard and soft. 

Dr Rachel: I love that. I think that was perfect for you. And just to finish off what has been for me and enlightening and illuminating discussion. 

In one word, what would you like the next five years to be like for you? 

Dr Joey: Exciting.  

Dr Rachel: Oh, that’s very nice. That is good.  

Dr Joey: I think when you do a PhD and you do all this kind of pre-work before you kind of ready to launch, you kind of expect and you hope for some form of excitement. So I’d love to feel excited in my life.  

Dr Rachel: So, well, thank you, Dr. Joey Weber. Thank you for taking the time to speak with me on the UnBroken Podcast. 

Thank you so much for your, deep answers to those very deep questions. And I look forward to speaking to you soon again,  

Dr Joey: Thanks Rachel. You always leave me a bit discombobulated and I’ll go and wonder around now or saying or wondering if I’ve said the right thing. 

Dr Rachel: Well, there is no, right there is no wrong there is only this moment. 

Don’t worry, Joey, if you need any support after this podcast, then please do get in touch with me. 

Right. Perfect. Okay.  

Dr Joey: I’m gonna look in the mirror now and say “who am I?”. See ya Rachel. 

Dr Rachel: Thank you. Thank you so much. 

So this is your 60 second recap of the UnBroken podcast, which was myself and Dr Joey Weber, our expert on equanimity, keeping balance and everything in life. And just quickly the recap, what came out the most is sort of the belonging question. Where do you belong? Do you belong? Have you got a place which is a childhood memory? Have you got a specific area that makes you feel connected and whole?  

Find that belonging find where you can go and recuperate and where you can rest because that underpins quite a lot of the balance that we need in life. We need to have that balance. We need homeostasis. Equanimity is basically a state where we can just observe the comings and the goings without any judgments. 

So find that place for you. And also challenge your viewpoint on kindness. What does kindness mean? Kindness can mean a multitude of things, but are you kind to you? And are you kind to others, and is that a long-term kindness, a medium-term kindness, or an instant kind of kindness? Just think about it. 

Thank you everybody. And tune in next time. Remember, give me a five star recommendation, out any comments in and let’s subscribe to get more from the UnBroken podcast. 

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